A Stark Contrast

I am continuously reminded of the world that lies beyond the North American borders. We lose ourselves in the comforts of this blessed country. We indulge in foods and entertainment that others could not even imagine. We who live "ordinary lives" are among the richest people in the world, and except a few pockets here and there scattered across the globe, so many live in  poverty. (This isn't to say we all have it good here. There are numerous tragedies on this very soil, but in general we do live more comfortably than others.)

The American dream becomes a stark contrast to what lies beyond a few southern borders, or just an ocean away. While we stress about driving through traffic or the line at Starbucks, others across the globe are struggling to feed their malnourished children or receive the treatment for tuberculosis. The sheer culture shock is why people are debriefed before and after going across seas. We are not mentally prepared for what lies beyond.

For years, my heart has been longing to reach such nations. I began studying at a community college for nursing, only to realize that my heart was passionate about pathology. I moved to Bozeman so I can finish my bachelor in microbiology. Ultimately, Lord willing, I want to get through med school and join Doctors Without Borders. While I am on the right track, it feels like it is taking too long. I wish I could walk out my front door now. I wish I could buy a plane ticket and fly to Africa. I wish I could find those refugee camps where Ebola and XDR-TB ravage the countryside. I want to help the inflicted, both researching in their lab and directly working with the people. However, I know that I would only be in the way if I went right now. I know I must first prepare myself.

You may ask, what can you do while you are still here? One could volunteer locally, or donate money to an organization, or at the very least keep these people in prayers. We can also gain a little perspective. While we are distracted by the "suffering" of a First World country (like trying to send a text when our battery is dying or passing the "idiot" who is driving too slow) let's remember that at the end of the day we will be climbing into a warm bed with a full stomach. Instead of naming off all the things that went wrong in our day, we should count our blessings and seek ways in which to bless others less fortunate. Don't turn a blind eye to the inflictions of the world. Here their cry and answer.

Trials as blessings

The valley sits in a haze as fires ignite everywhere. Smoke settles as low as the treetops, thick as cotton, hiding the light of the sun from even the keenest eye. Everyone was so happy for the skip of springs showers, yet unknown to all was the great price we were to pay for it. It seems as dusk in the middle of the day.

How many times do we fear the storms in our own life? How often do we despair at even the smallest trials? As one band put it, "Cuz' the pain that you've been feeling / Is just the dark before the morning". How difficult would it be to recognize the blessings in our life, if we did not experience trials and heartbreak? Perhaps they are a reminder, adjusting our perspective, to see how great the little joys are in life. Perhaps they themselves are blessings in disguise, allowing us to truly appreciate a happy moment, a blessed moment, a moment of opportunity when they arise.

Count your trials as blessings and hardships as reminders. Without them there would be no contrast to illuminate the great times, and life would then fade into a mundane, monotonous rhythm.

Knowing you...

Isn't it odd how someone can know you for years and yet never know you? Or how you can think you know yourself only to wake up one day realizing you have no idea who you are? As soon as you think you have a grasp of who you are and who you want to be, or as soon as you think you know someone else, everything changes and you find yourself at a loss. It doesn't matter how hard we try, we will never get people to know us entirely. We will never entirely know ourselves. But God does.

He knows us better than we know ourselves. He sees the deepest corners of our heart. He sees what we struggle so hard to hide. He sees those things which we deny. He looks directly into our soul. Nothing can hide from His sight. Yet the most amazing thing about God is that He loves us anyways.

When He looks into our heart He sees a person He intentionally created. He sees a human being whom He fashioned with purpose, and of His own breath breathed into life. And He smiles. And He loves us.

We are not perfect - we do error and make mistakes - yet there is nothing He cannot fix. There is no brokenness He cannot put back together. The greatest of all sins is believing our brokenness is beyond repair.  It is believing God is not big enough to mend us and make us whole.

So the next time you look into the mirror, remember that the God of the universe has a plan. He saw the need for another life to be birthed, another story to be wrote, and so with great purpose He fashioned you. You may not know yourself... the world may not know you... but God does.

Love...

"For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit." Jeremiah 17:8

Likewise ought we to seek after the fountain of life. Everyday. For a life with Christ is a day to day journey, and not merely a moment's feeling. To seek His face continually. That is true happiness this world can never know.

Recently I have not stood fast to this. I have found myself not as close to Him as I would like. But today I am reminded of His great love for us. He truly loves each and everyone of us. And for the first time in my life... I prayed for the people whom I considered my enemies. I don't mean those whom I don't get along with. I mean those whom over the years I have never been able to forget, whose memory yet burning in my mind and heart. We all have somebody like that. Well today I prayed for those few, and sincerely asked God to shower His love on them.

I cannot believe it still, but I strangely felt at peace. I remembered the love of God, and how great it was. That dream I had, I don't know how I shall every explain how Jesus looked at me. Full of love and full of mercy. He did not judge me, though He had every right to do so. He smiled instead. He loves everyone one of us like that, including those whom I consider my... least favorite. lol.

When I prayed to God, asking for Him to show Himself to them and fill them with remarkable love and joy, I found myself filled with love. And for a split second, I saw the world how He does. For Christ came not to judge, but those whom will not believe in Him are condemned already.

People we NEED Jesus. I don't care what the world tells you. You will never feel or even know true happiness and peace until you make Jesus apart of your life, and I don't just mean on Sunday's. I don't just mean going through the motions of being a Christian either. For there are a lot of people who claim to be Christians who simply are not. I mean, when you give your life to Christ, believing and accepting His gift of salvation, letting it change your life. There is no greater love, joy or peace then with the Lord Jesus Christ.

This may sound cheesy, and redundant. Who has hasn't heard, "God loves you". If but we could truly understand. We cannot fathom His love for us because it is more than we can bare. Yes. If He were to show Himself to us, the love in His eyes would bring everyone to their knees. Heck, we wouldn't be able to do anything but bask in His presence.

There will come a day when every knee shall bow, and every tongue confess that Christ is Lord. Yet that is not today. Today, we live in a world full of hardship, trials, and deceit. Today we do not see the glory of the Lord. But let me tell you, He is freakin' antsy to show Himself to us. To you. Not that He might show off His glory and might, but that He might show unto us His great love for us. He desires all to come unto salvation, and that none should perish.

To all of you who are broken-hearted. How He wishes to hold you close and comfort you, for He loves the broken and contrite heart. He desires to make His love known unto us. If this reaches but one person who thinks no one cares, who thinks their pain goes unnoticed, know that the Lord is beside you with arms open wide. He bids you come and find peace in Him. If you could but see Him, you would see the great, incomprehensible, overwhelming love in His eyes. For God so loved the world...

I had a dream

I saw the face of Jesus.

It was dark outside, and cold. Snow swept across the fogging windshield and piled around the already buried tires. No doubt, like last year, I had never gotten around to putting on winter tires. To add to my frustration the engine was sputtering out as well.

There was a glow from a house close by, and a stream of thick smoking lifting into the night sky. My sister and I hesitated, but finally we decided to trudge through the knee high snow and knock on the door. A woman appeared in the doorway. I don't recall for sure, but I believe she wore an apron and had something cooking on the stove. To say the least it was a warm, cozy place, and with open arms they welcomed us in.

They were a sweet couple. They offered us a cup of hot something, and a place to sleep. The next morning we awoke, and from there it blurred for a bit. We must have stayed for a couple days because we got to know them fairly well. It was through one of our conversations around the fireplace when they brought up the rumors of the traveling train.

There had been several accounts of a man, many whom claimed was Jesus, passing through from town to town along the railroad. The accounts all said children accompanied Him, and that wherever He visited many had believed on the Lord, giving their life to Jesus. It was then they told us that He would be passing through that town in just a few short days. Obviously there was no exact schedule, but the rumors claimed His next destination was there.

A few mornings later news spread that He would be arriving in a few short hours. Alina and I were skeptical, yet curious. Bundled up in borrowed boots, jackets, hats and scarves, we made our way to the train station. There was a small crowd gathering, whispering to one another in anticipation. We all had the same question in mind. Who was this man whom touched the hearts and inspired so many people? Who was this man whom they called Jesus?

It first came as a small light, flickering off in the distance. As it grew closer, the light brightened and lit up the sky. The engine rumbled, smoke bellowed high, and the rhythmic grind of the gears. What surprised us all was the sound of laughter. Child laughter, starting out faint and barely audible and growing louder.

Before we knew it, the train was hauling in right beside us. Odd as it may sound, the cars had no roofs, and thus were exposed to the weather. Yet no one appeared cold. There were children everywhere, and suddenly just being in there midst made one bubble up in laughter and joy.

We ran along with the train until it came to a complete stop. When it did, I climbed up the side of one car and found myself looking right into the face of the man whom everyone called Jesus. In an instant I knew that all the rumors were true. I was looking right into the eyes of the Son of God. I saw His love. I saw Him looking at me, and I crumbled from the intensity of His love for me, and I cried. My whole body shook. In that moment I was overwhelmed in His presence.

He was surrounded by little children of all ages. He wore no fancy robes. He wore no crown of jewels. He was dressed quite simple. He was clean shaven save something of a three day stubble. His hair was brown, curly locks. His eyes I cannot put into words. Imagine a light hue, almost the color of blue and like glass. When He looked at you He looked into your soul. All knowing, yet entirely and altogether loving. I cannot explain this love that I felt, but when He set His gaze on me I felt so comforted, so rejuvenated, so full of hope, and so loved. I didn't want to let Him go. I understood in that moment what true unconditional love was. And his smile. He smiled at me. After seeing beyond the walls I had built up over the years, after seeing and acknowledging every hidden secret within my heart, after beholding my dirty and blemished soul, He smiled at me.

What is in a smile? I tell you, I cannot know save the smile of Jesus Christ. He did not condemn me. He loved me. He greeted me like I meant everything to Him. That was how He greeted everyone. It reminded me of that verse,

"For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved." John 3:17 KJV

He didn't say much, but this one thing I remember well. I don't recall the exact words, but one thing He kept repeating over and over was, “Trace my image and share it with the world.”

I told Him I did not understand. I told Him I had a sore hand for art, and that I could never do His glory justice. He only replied with the same request. I understand now that He did not mean literally draw His face, but rather share to the world the image of who He was and what He had done. I finally told Him I would. (This is me trying.)

The train had to pull out not long after that, and I begged Him to stay. I clung to Him, and nigh willed Him to remain, but He said He must continue. I begged to follow Him. I did not want to ever leave His side again. He was suddenly all I cared to live for. But in a still, small voice He told me to stay and pursue the calling He had given me. It reminded me of the man whom Jesus delivered from the demons when He crossed the sea of Galilee. The man begged to follow Jesus, but Christ commanded him to stay and go and share with the town what the Lord had done.

"And when he was come into the ship, he that had been possessed with the devil prayed him that he might be with him. 

"Howbeit Jesus suffered him not, but saith unto him, Go home to thy friends, and tell them how great things the Lord hath done for thee, and hath had compassion on thee.

^"And he departed, and began to publish in Decapolis how great things Jesus had done for him: and all men did marvel."

Mark 5:18-20

I was not on that train when it pulled out. I remained behind. This truly applies to me in real life because for a long time I have been restless to go and do God's work in other countries right now. There have been nights where I could not sleep and would do anything to leave everything behind and just go. I have had really no patience to wait on the Lord's timing. But in that dream, when He told me to stay behind, I know that He was referring to me remaining here in the Flathead Valley and continuing school, being a witness here for Him.

When the engine began to rumble and smoke bellow out, I asked Jesus in my dream to let me look at His face once more. To gaze into His beautiful countenance, and behold His pure, innocent yet powerful glory. Pure love. Unconditional. Pure joy. I have never felt anything like it before.

I had cried when I looked into his face. Tears not of sadness, but an overwhelming of peace. I cried when I later rejoined the crowds and tried to tell them what I saw. I cried when I awoke this morning and discovered this all a dream. I cried when I realized that God did indeed care enough to visit me in a dream, JUST to tell me that He loved me, that He knew all I had and was currently going through, and to tell me He heard every prayer. He had been just as excited and anxious to meet me as I was to see Him. To show Himself unto me after all these years. He had seen my blind faith, and He at last manifested a small portion of Himself. I will forever remember that night.

Too often we think that because God does not come storming through and presenting His full majesty for us to behold, performing astounding miracles in our lives, that He must not see us or care for us. We think that God must not love us because He does not manifest himself to us. We think He doesn't care because He allows tragedies to befall us. We tend to think that we are too blemished for Him to care to love us or forgive us. We are so quick to condemn ourselves. But let me tell you this. To everyone who desires a relationship and reconciliation with Jesus Christ, He does not condemn you, but loves and cherishes you. He rejoices over you, and He is smiling on you right now though you cannot see Him. He hears you. I can vouch for that.

I looked on the internet about images of Jesus. Numerous life accounts poured through Google search, and everyone exclaimed over and over about His eyes and love. They claimed he had light eyes, some thought green and others blue. I personally believe they are a color no man can recognize, yet our mind struggles to tag a color our simple minds know.

I am positive with no doubt that I saw Jesus. I know it, and this I will cherish. I can hardly wait to see Him again in Heaven, and I desperately hope I have the most blessed opportunity to see Him again before then.

 "That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, 

"May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; 

"And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God."

Ephesians 3:17-19 KJV

Sharing His love

Sometime ago I shared that I was sponsoring a child over seas. His name was Shishir. Unfortunately, I received an email a couple weeks ago informing me that Shishir had moved away, and was no longer available to be sponsored. I was worried, thinking the worst, but they assured me that he was healthy and in good care. They told me that he had only moved away from their ministry base of Compassion International in that area.

I have been praying on whether or not to adopt another child. Knowing that you are giving hope to a child (or family) in need is so rewarding. No doubt I do want to continue to donate in some way or another. I started reading up on the internet of other ministries. I looked through the EurasiaCommunity website. I went to the MSF Doctors Without Borders website. I started thinking that perhaps instead of giving a huge chunk of money to one organization, maybe I should disperse it among a few.

The Lord has blessed me in so many ways lately. Beyond proving me a place to stay for low rent, He has provided scholastic funds, healed my car, and given me multiple avenues to earn money. The Lord has indeed seen me through every obstacle, meeting my every need.

I had a dream a few weeks ago - I won't go into it now, but it was incredible and I will post it soon - about the Lord telling me to share His testimony to the world, and share His love. I plan to do just that.

If but the world could see His love! His love is more than anyone of us can imagine. When people say that God is love, they have noo idea how true that is! I caught a glimpse of just how big His love is, but it was for only a second. For anyone out there who is struggling and feels all alone, take heart! I have been there, and Someone cares! Someone hears your prayers. His name is Jesus, and He loves you beyond your wildest dreams.

Suicidal Deer

I can hardly wait for school to start! I just picked up my books today, and am reminded how blessed I am to have received financial aid. The total was over $800! Truly God has helped me through all of this. I could not have done this without Him, and the people He has moved to support me.

I am reminded of my first semester of college and how scary yet exciting it was. One class in particular - public speaking - I was terrified to take. Yet in the end it was truly one of my favorites. Here is just one of the many speeches I had to give.

_________________

   It's 8:00 at night and the moon starts to rise just above the tree line. It's Christmas Eve and anxiously Billy heads home to his family. Over the frozen pavement his headlights beam, showing him the way. Intently he watches for black ice.

   Suddenly out of the middle of nowhere something leaps from the dense woods and onto the highway only several feet from his Dodge. It's a deer and steadfast it remains, its feet planted firmly in the middle of the road. Grabbing the wheel with both hands Billy steadies the vehicle and prepares for the collision. Of all days to hit a deer.

   We all experience a version of this sometime in our driving career. Perhaps we manage to swerve out of the way or break just in time. Perhaps we hit it instead and total our cars, sending us or a friend to the hospital. Living in a rural state such as Montana we are bound to find ourselves in some sort of wildlife accident.

   How can we stop this? How can we solve this ongoing issue? Every year, we spend $1 billion solely to vehicle damage. 10,000 people are seriously injured and 150 killed due to deer collisions in the US. Montana alone ranks #5 in the top states for such accidents.

   We need to put an end to this. The solution is simple. No deer near the highways, no more hits. As one sign posted along a back road, “Suicidal deer. Please drive slowly,” such cautions would no longer exist.

   Imagine how much safer we would feel driving down the roads at night. We wouldn't have to worry about our loved ones tangling with a buck leaping from the shadows. We wouldn't have to pay all those medical bills fixing our broken bodies because we swerved and flipped our car. We wouldn't have to spend $1 billion at the autobody and mechanic shop. We could drive confidently and at ease. Our only problem left would be drunk drivers!

   So let's take care of this! How? We all know deer hate the hunting season. They run at the crack of a shotgun. They hide deep in the forests, watching for the bright color of hunter orange. So send your cars for a paint job and upgrade your horn to the sound of a 30 out 6. Who says we have to stand for this nonsense?

Restlessness

I have been growing restless again for minsitry. It's been nigh four years, and I feel I might break. Call me crazy, but I can't stop thinking about Mexico. I remember the life there. We didn't know many times what the next day would hold. We went where the Lord lead. We met people of all walks of life. Some were devout Christians, with the same stirring for ministry as us, others were back slidden, needing motivation and a revival in their hearts. Some had never even heard of the name of Jesus. We slept where they slept, wept when they wept, and rejoiced when they rejoiced. We grew together in Christ. We gained much, and we lost much.

Since Mexico, I have struggled to live a routine life. I am not used to planning months into my future. I am restless. I am reminded of those still suffering, those still hungry. I know I am preparing myself for eventually going across seas, and serving in the medical field, but I grow anxious to help and do something now. I'm afraid to step out on my own, but I am more afraid of doing nothing. I must do something.

The world can't wait for us to be good and ready. Everyday, everyone is one more day closer to death. Everyday, is one day closer to Christ's coming. And though we look forward to that day with exceeding joy, there are still those who have not heard of the Gospel. How can we sit idly by knowing the lost walk among us?

Yes, one can reach out in ministry to the local communities. Yes. There are ministry opportunities left and right, right here in Montana. But what about those beyond our borders? What about those forgotten? They are dismissed too often with the excuse that another will reach out to them. There are the few that do. Why can't I be that person? God has given me this restlessness for a reason.
I vow to go where the Lord leadeth, but I pray He leadeth me to venture beyond my borders.

God is GOOD

God is so good! How often we hear those words, yet think nothing of it. Yesterday, those words came to life. God has blessed me so much I am losing count of them all. Lol. No I didn't win the lottery, and no I wasn't given a 2014 Jaguar. The Lord has blessed me with opportunities to serve, with a clearer understanding of His word, with a growing passion to be like Him, and love the world as He does.

In addition, I received an award letter from a scholarship. It truly came just in time, for my bills was going to be cutting into the negative. With that scholarship I have less then fifty dollars to pay for tuition this semester. See, God does come through when we take that leap of faith, and choose to follow Him.

It is through the times of testing and trials where we see His power the most. When we choose to let go, it is then He can move mountains in our lives. When we give Him the wheel, like that one song by Carrie Underwood, it is then that He will take control and show us the way. We can rest assured that under His wings we shall never be desolate. Take heart and never give up, for in the footsteps of the Almighty will we find victory. God IS good!

College Debate over Creationism

"And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul." This is found in the book of Genesis, chapter two, verse seven, of the Bible.

Schools these days teach evolution, and how the world came into being through a series of combustible activity. They speak of how we were dealt a lucky hand in that life on earth was established when a Big Bang exploded in the sky. Indeed, there might have been a big bang, but not by accident. It did not take billions of years, but merely six days (thats less than a week) to complete creation, wrought by a sovereign God with unlimited power. Yet we are not taught this in most schools. Instead, we are told how the world and even the complexity and perfect functioning of the present human body, down to the alignment of every cell and its forming of our organs, can come from the evolving of simpler more flawed creatures. I beg to differ.

The eye itself is comprised of in numerous mechanical pieces. From the hundreds of cells, to the thousands of proteins, to how the eye reacts to light and expands in darkness, to the clarity of the lens and how it can focus from even a great distance, to even how the brain sorts through the information the eye sends, and creates an image for us to understand. This organ is complicated to the highest degree, and could not have developed over time. After all, how did evolution know the eye was needed when there was no telling there was anything to see? It must have been intentionally created. Not to mention that if chance could throw together a masterpiece such as the eye, then why can't we, with our intelligent minds, duplicate that same organ to give sight to the blind?

Do you know of any building that did not have a builder? Do you know of any book that did not have a writer? Do you know of any song that did not have a composer? How about this one: Do you know of any world that did not have a Maker?

Sir Fred Hoyle, British mathematician and astronomer, was quoted in Nature magazine, November 12, 1981, as saying, "The chance that higher life forms might have emerged in this way is comparable with the chance that a tornado sweeping through a junk-yard might assemble a Boeing 747 from the materials therein."

Why then is this theory of evolution being taught to the future generations? Perhaps because many truly believe it. Perhaps because many do not wish to admit there is a God. It is obvious though, that throughout the world and for thousands of years, mankind have sought for a higher power. They seek something or someone to worship. They seek a dictator, a leader, a judge. The Muslims believe in Allah, Hindu does Buddha, and the early Egyptians gave reverence to a sun God amongst many others. In America, we too seek to worship and reverend something or someone, be it materialistic gain, fame, or a celebrity. The only conclusion we can draw is that we as humans are wired with a like mind, a hunger if you will, to put our trust in something.

Beyond this instinct of ours, there is more in nature that proves that we were created. Take a look at a common number that streams through all of the universe. There are 3,168 furlongs in the Earth’s radius, 31,680 miles in its perimeter, and when you add up the “square circle of the earth”, it totals 31,680 miles. All of these examples of the same number can only mean one thing. There is a common thread tying together all of nature. Further more, there is a fingerprint in all of the universe.

One of the main illustrations of evolution is how we came from monkeys. In truth, we do have similar characteristics to the chimpanzee. To name a few: we share 85-95% of the same DNA, we often eat a common diet, we both use a form of communication (theirs done mostly through grunts, hoots, even screams), and we both love to socialize and show affection be it hugging, giving a friendly pat or even tickling. Yes... even tickling. But one problem still seems to stand in the way of them being our ancestors. If evolution is the refining for a better creature, and we are that better and more accomplished creature, why then do chimpanzees still exist? Why do sloths exist? And why did the Woolly Mammoth become extinct?

There are answers to these questions. The answers do not hide from us, and they are at our grasp. They all point to one explanation. We are not alone in this universe. We have a Creator.

By the power of His words the world came into being. He said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. He molded the mountains and opened the valleys with just His voice. The waters, so deep and untamed, He constrained them about with beaches of fine sand and precarious and lofty cliffs. The seed He folded into the soil, and nursing it with care, it bore goodly fruits. 6 days and the work was complete. And yet as amazing as it all was, the best creation was mankind. The only, in which He breathed life into from His own self.

People will always seek proof and evidence of how the world came into existence. And indeed, as we have seen, there is proof but we often tend to forget the evidence that surrounds us. The evidence manifesting before our very eyes. When we first hold a newborn, or when our bodies fight a virus, or when we find ourselves falling in love for the first time. The things of the heart… emotions… our ever nagging consciousness… even how the earth spins and how we manage to not fall off. WE are that evidence that there is a Creator, and that life is an intentional creation. Not only is life intentional but we, you and me, are beautifully and wonderfully made by a sovereign God. And we have a purpose.

By His Breath

Imagine the universe spread from east to west, beyond the eye could ever see. Imagine the blazing flame of the sun, to warm our skin and burn the darkness away. Imagine the power of the wind, how it heaves with every breath. Imagine every living creature, somehow coexisting in an odd sort of balance of life and death. Imagine the mighty waves that roar and crash against the precipice cliff, that tower above its waters. Imagine the depth of the ocean and all its mysteries.Imagine each and every phenomenon which cannot be explained by evolution. Some will always argue life came from a Big Bang, a sudden burst of certain chemicals by chance. I say it is the evidence of a God, and with but one voice the earth was spoken into motion. By His breath, we have life.

Redemption

Those times when God has an amazing plan for your life, but you go and mess things up in the millionth crime. You question if it's worth to apologize once again. The words aren't new. He's heard them been said. But then you hear His voice, He tells you to change. He tells you He's got a better and more perfect way. He says it's all yours. All you gotta do is believe. Just believe that He died and rose again and that YOU ARE FREE. You are free from the chains that sin has bound you in. You are free from the Devil and his devious plans so, believe and have faith. Pray and mean what you say. Then give it to God and rejoice in His grace. This is not a competition, but a lifetime revelation. About the One who died for you. Its a chance at redemption. Redemption is a gift. It isn't earned nor deserved. The guy you told you that, his name is Lucifer. God's gift is free. It's free to all mankind. All you gotta do is believe and take a chance at life. Take a chance to live, to live for the better. For the better becomes eternal, when you give your life to the Father. So the next time someone tells you, "You're no good. You don't deserve it." Reply with a smile, "You're right, but I have it."

Invisibly

God has been working amazingly in my life. Everything from blessing me with true friends and a loving family, to giving me the opportunity and way to pursue this calling of nursing, to just encouraging me and motivating me to continue in His will.

I went to a luncheon today at the community college I attend. It was to honor the many donors of scholarships as well as congratulate the recipient students. I was blessed enough to be one. I was nervous at first, but soon that subsided as it was replaced with a kindling fire and assurance that I was doing what God wanted me to do. I witnessed countless donors and students who publicly professed their Faith. I had the opportunity to meet my supporters. I enjoyed a wonderful lunch (with pumpkin cheesecake as a dessert).

This day. This week. This year has truly been blessed. Yet now is the week upon us where many children don their costumes and trick or treat. So much darkness is in this time of year. Most people do not see it because it is subtle. Yet through and through not all take October 31 as just a fun filled day. Many take it to a serious occult level.

God has weighed it heavily on my heart to pray for this nation... To pray globally over this day and the children and families. May God's presence be evident and His power be at work today as this spiritual battle is being fought invisibly around us. Unknown to the eye yet ever amongst us.

Gloria a Dios!

Praise God! From the highest mountains to the deepest seas, let us lift our voices in adoration to our King! He has blessed me so much. From gifting me with a scholarship to cover yet more of my college tuition, to giving me so many great friends, to indeed being my comforter in every hardship. The Lord Jehovah is in truth, the Father of love, mercy, compassion, and power. And so much more!

My car died several times today. It couldn't hold an idle for more than a second; which is not near enough to pull the gear from park into drive. The devil truly is using every trick up his sleeve to discourage me, and to keep me from pursuing the calling God has set for me. But the enemy will not win. I will not back down. God has given me an assignment to serve across seas and I will not 'throw in the towel'. I will not let God or those overseas be disappointed.

There will come a day when I will pass all these obstacles and look back on the path which I struggled. I will know that the trials were worth it. I will be amazed at God's grace in guiding me. I will worship Him for all He has done. And thus, I shall worship Him even now. Gloria a Dios!

A New Person

God is so good! But of course you all already know that. =)

It hasn't been all rainbows and daisies recently, but the Lord is faithful. Despite all that I struggle with I see Him working in amazing ways, behind the scenes. He has become so much apart of my daily activities. He has His foot in everything I do and I love it! I want to include Him. No longer do I feel His presence only at church, but in every single aspect of my life.

He is healing me from the inside out. He is blessing me. He is giving me the strength to endure the trials I face everyday. In fact, despite all the heartache of I am dealing with I have to say that this season has been great! It has been blessed! I will remember these days as a paradise. Why? Not because of what the world has thrown at me, but because of how God has been working in my life... in my heart. I feel like a completely new person! And I am so excited to share it with you all!

My first ever!

98 Dodge Neon. At the end of the day, when all else seems to fail, I feel Him lift me up and bless me. Indeed, He is faithful to those who seek Him. He is faithful and He is wonderful. Thank you God for all you do. Alas, I know you are with me.


Let me introduce you to my first ever...

 

In the blank spaces

We all experience times in our life when it seems that our days are wasting away with no purpose or fulfillment. Many times it is our doing because we are afraid to take a leap of faith and follow the calling God has set before us. Yet many times, it is God who calls us to these seasons of... waiting.

I recently experienced one of these some time back. At first it was terrible. I was so anxious. I wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to go somewhere and now. I didn't want to wait even another day. I was restless and worried. Most of all I had my eyes focused on the past with no hope or care for the future. I was honestly convinced - I know it's weird - that the Lord would return in the year 2012. I thought there was no point of planning a life past that because it would never exist. As you can imagine my surprise when January 1st 2013 rolled into view.

I realized that I had wasted so much time just sitting around and refusing that there could be a year past 2012. I realized that it had kept me from coming to know the calling God had for my life. It kept me from pursuing this calling. It kept me looking back and wishing I could turn back the clock of time, sure that time was soon to be up. Boy was I wrong.

So what happened after I realized I could have a future? I saw myself helping the poorest of the poor and most needy in unnamed villages of far away places... yet I didn't know how to get there. I didn't know where I had to start.

I prayed for months seeking guidance. I searched the web for organizations and programs that would get me out into the mission field. I dreamed dreams and sought the advice of other missionaries. While many roads presented themselves, none seemed right. I thought I was just being indecisive and unmotivated. I thought I would lose interest and eventually give up searching. I prayed but it seemed no one answered. Until I finally typed in the url to a link I had received - and later forgotten - months before.

DoctorsWithoutBorders (MSF). While not Christian, they do bring hope to the most needy. They are the voice of the voiceless. I realized that I could do that and, with shining the light of Christ, be a witness to so many.

But I needed training. They were not amateurs in their field and neither could I be. I needed four years of training to be exact and another two of experience. Thus I start my journey of becoming a nurse, beginning with my generals at the local community college.

I am excited to begin in the fall and with this new dream ahead of me I can now look ahead instead of behind. I still cherish the past dearly but I do not live in it. I do not desire to bring it back but rather to take on tomorrow.

My point brings me to, first off: DO NOT ASSUME THE DAYS OF YOUR FUTURE BUT RATHER EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED. Don't be narrow-minded of what you think tomorrow holds, keeping you from truly understanding what could and what God wills to happen.

Secondly: WHEN YOU SEEK HIM AND HIS ANSWER IS "WAIT"... THEN WAIT. Do not take your life into your own hands. His timing is perfect and those seasons in your life when it seems like all your doing is waiting for an answer, don't lose hope. These are the blank spaces of your life. But in truth they are more important than we can know. They are to prepare, to equip, to strengthen and to draw us closer to Him. To wait on the Lord is to seek Him and yearn for Him. It means to abide in Him and lean only on His understanding. It means to trust.

Don't take these times for granted. Don't waste them. Use them as an opportunity. Fill these blank spaces with a passion to seek God and shine His light to all you meet.

Take heart therefore. Be not anxious or impatient but anticipate the wonderful plans God has for your future. He does have plans for you. Plans He wrote out before you were born. Plans that He is overjoyed to begin in your life. So rejoice! Take joy that you have a promising future with Him.

God's Canvas

This afternoon my family drove up this long dusty road. Potholes scattered left and right as it slowly wound around the mountainside and up to the snowline of the Bob Marshall. Everything was so beautiful and green. I could hardly believe it. It made me wonder how often we witness the beauty of God's creation and yet hardly take notice. Perhaps our eyes are so spoiled we begin to take advantage of what we see and soon forget to see it altogether.
Today, for the first time in weeks, I bothered to lift my gaze from the ground at my feet. Yes, the sky was mostly overcast and yes, a slight wind blew. Yet even so were the trees majestically tall and thick. So were the rivers running rapidly, springing from the icy cold depths of the snowfields. Lower down, the green grass of meadows poked above the blankets of whiteness as the first of the spring blooms dared to lift their heads. Up higher, the cliffs hung with some so precariously. Just the slightest nudge it seemed and half the mountain would tumble down.
God created all of this. He etched the valleys, molded the mountains, drew the paths of the mighty rivers and built the rocky towers that rested so carefully in its place. He breathed out the blanketing clouds, and He lit the suns flame to keep us warm. Our God is so powerful and creative and He took the time to decorate this earth that He placed us on. He gave us beautiful places to call our home and every new day He paints a new canvas for us to enjoy. So smile today and lift up your eyes to this masterpiece, because never will there be another like it.

The Maker’s Canvas

The other day, while researching on the internet, I came across a photo of a Mandarin Duck. The caption spoke of some interesting facts about the mammal but what caught my eye was the color.
Do you see the ruby red, and golden yellows? Notice the vivid green or even the stark white. All of them and more decorate the feathers in so many patterns. Honestly, how can man say it was all by chance?
Doesn’t the sheer beauty and creativity portray the work of a skilled artist? For in truth, had Picasso or Da Vinci or Michelangelo crafted such a piece, the work would have been legendary. Yet they did not. And of all their paintings, great and small, none could compare to even one of God’s masterpieces.
But let us not defame or put down these gifted artists but see that in truth, artistry could not have come to us by chance. No you see, it started with the work of one Artist, who by painting, shaping, crafting, and etching made a world abounding in beauty and skill. And on the sixth day… created He His most cherished work. Created He man.

Love's Mystery...

Do you ever wonder if Love is harder to come by than most believe? Suppose Love is a mystery that very few really understood or even have. Does true Love really fade? Is there such thing as falling out of Love?
These words are yet unspoken on my lips. For other than my family I have not felt that fire but I do know that when I do I will mean it.
I often wonder how many hearts could be saved from breaking, how many tears could be spared, if but the words "I love you" were not so freely uttered.
I know there is such a thing as true Love - for Love is of God - but perhaps we only have it for one person. Our "other half" that the Lord created for us. Perhaps all other Love is only an infatuation. How do we then discern what we truly feel? Perhaps Love finds us rather than we finding it. Perhaps Love falls down on us rather than we falling into it.
All I know is that when I find that somebody to love I'll be grateful that I waited.