We all experience times in our life when it seems that our days are wasting away with no purpose or fulfillment. Many times it is our doing because we are afraid to take a leap of faith and follow the calling God has set before us. Yet many times, it is God who calls us to these seasons of... waiting.
I recently experienced one of these some time back. At first it was terrible. I was so anxious. I wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to go somewhere and now. I didn't want to wait even another day. I was restless and worried. Most of all I had my eyes focused on the past with no hope or care for the future. I was honestly convinced - I know it's weird - that the Lord would return in the year 2012. I thought there was no point of planning a life past that because it would never exist. As you can imagine my surprise when January 1st 2013 rolled into view.
I realized that I had wasted so much time just sitting around and refusing that there could be a year past 2012. I realized that it had kept me from coming to know the calling God had for my life. It kept me from pursuing this calling. It kept me looking back and wishing I could turn back the clock of time, sure that time was soon to be up. Boy was I wrong.
So what happened after I realized I could have a future? I saw myself helping the poorest of the poor and most needy in unnamed villages of far away places... yet I didn't know how to get there. I didn't know where I had to start.
I prayed for months seeking guidance. I searched the web for organizations and programs that would get me out into the mission field. I dreamed dreams and sought the advice of other missionaries. While many roads presented themselves, none seemed right. I thought I was just being indecisive and unmotivated. I thought I would lose interest and eventually give up searching. I prayed but it seemed no one answered. Until I finally typed in the url to a link I had received - and later forgotten - months before.
DoctorsWithoutBorders (MSF). While not Christian, they do bring hope to the most needy. They are the voice of the voiceless. I realized that I could do that and, with shining the light of Christ, be a witness to so many.
But I needed training. They were not amateurs in their field and neither could I be. I needed four years of training to be exact and another two of experience. Thus I start my journey of becoming a nurse, beginning with my generals at the local community college.
I am excited to begin in the fall and with this new dream ahead of me I can now look ahead instead of behind. I still cherish the past dearly but I do not live in it. I do not desire to bring it back but rather to take on tomorrow.
My point brings me to, first off: DO NOT ASSUME THE DAYS OF YOUR FUTURE BUT RATHER EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED. Don't be narrow-minded of what you think tomorrow holds, keeping you from truly understanding what could and what God wills to happen.
Secondly: WHEN YOU SEEK HIM AND HIS ANSWER IS "WAIT"... THEN WAIT. Do not take your life into your own hands. His timing is perfect and those seasons in your life when it seems like all your doing is waiting for an answer, don't lose hope. These are the blank spaces of your life. But in truth they are more important than we can know. They are to prepare, to equip, to strengthen and to draw us closer to Him. To wait on the Lord is to seek Him and yearn for Him. It means to abide in Him and lean only on His understanding. It means to trust.
Don't take these times for granted. Don't waste them. Use them as an opportunity. Fill these blank spaces with a passion to seek God and shine His light to all you meet.
Take heart therefore. Be not anxious or impatient but anticipate the wonderful plans God has for your future. He does have plans for you. Plans He wrote out before you were born. Plans that He is overjoyed to begin in your life. So rejoice! Take joy that you have a promising future with Him.